Reason 1: Your WiFi is turned on
Having your WiFi turned on allows you to connect to the Internet wirelessly. Try turning it off, then come back here.
Reason 2: Your Ethernet cable is plugged into your computer
An Ethernet cable allows you to connect to the internet using a cable thats connected from your Computer to your router. Try unplugging it, then come back here.
Reason 3: Your Router is plugged into the wall
Your Router being plugged into the wall means that its getting an internet connection. Try unplugging it to prevent it from connecting to the internet, then come back here.
Reason 4: You're using your Neighbor's internet
To be fair, if you're using your Neighbor's internet, there's not really much that can be done about that. Try knocking on your neighbor's door and asking them to either change their WiFi password, or put their Microwave on full blast to stop their internet from working, then come back here.
Reason 5: You're using free internet somewhere
The place you're at right now probably has free internet available and you're probably using it right now which could be allowing you to connect to the internet. Try moving a couple Microwave's into there and put them on full blast, then come back here.
Reason 6: You're using someone's Mobile Hotspot
Whoever you're with right probably has their Phone's Mobile Hotspot turned on and you're probably using it right now, which may be enabling you to get online. Try yeeting their Phone at a tree, then come back here.
Reason 7: You're using a Portable Hotspot device
A Portable Hotspot such as the Verizon MiFi Jetpack, allow's you to have a WiFi connection wherever you go with it, you probably have one of these and are connected to it right now. Try running it over with your car, then come back here.
Reason 8: You're using Satilite Internet
Satilite Internet is normally used in more remote areas' and rural areas' where it's harder to get regular Internet. Try climbing ontop of your house with a stick and beat the crap out the Satilite until it falls down.
Reason 9: You're using DSL Internet
DSL was used back when Dial-Up internet was still a thing, and is still used to this day, but is not as common. Try ramming your car into the Telephone pole outside of your house, or setting the pole on fire.
Reason 10: You're using Mobile Data
Your Mobile Data allows you to use the Internet on your phone without WiFi. Try knocking down the cell tower with a wrecking ball.
Reason 11: You're connected directly to the cell tower
I don't get how this would even be possible, but I guess it is. Being connected directly to the cell tower allows you to be connected to the Internet with the fastest speed allowed by the Tower. Try setting off an EMP on the Cell Tower.
Reason 12: You're connected directly to the wires coming out of the ground
Being connected directly to the wires coming out of the ground, while not ideal, it provides the best connection possible to the internet. Try using a machete to cut the wire.
Reason 13: You're connected directly to the Satilite on top of your house
Although unrealistic, being connected directly to the satellite you have on your house, will provide the best connection allowed by the satellite. Now, i know you're not gonna get up there again and get hospitalized, so instead, burn down your house to get rid of everything including the satilite.
Reason 14: You're connected directly to the Satilites in space
I don't know how this would be really possible and i doubt this would actually get you internet. Try stealing one of NASA's space shuttles to get up there and knock the satilite out of orbit.
Reason 15: You're using a solar panel to get your internet from the sun
I never thought this would be possible to accomplish, so how're you even doing it? Try throwing the solar panel in the ocean.
Reason 16: You're using the old AT&T LongLines system to get your Internet
AT&T LongLines was an old system used back in the 1980's for telecommunications, they utilized tall towers with big Microwave Horn Antennas on them. Try setting off a nuke next to the tower.
Reason 17: You're devices still work
Well obviously if your devices still work, you'll still be able to find some other method of getting online. Try throwing your devices off of a skyscraper in order to destroy them.
You seem to of reached the end! Thank you for visiting, this took me a very long time to make.